Responsibility is a double edged sword!

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It was weird. I was fine talking with dan for the first time in a while, and I got this pain right behind my left eye. It didn’t go away after like 5 minutes and I wasn’t taking chances that a migrane would develop. So I took the drugs.

I am finding I need to make decisions at work more and more without going through anyone. I knew that was what was needed, I am after all a manager now. it is funny, since I don’t consider myself one. But I have allot to oversee now. I don’t say that to think I am so super important. On the contrary, I say that because the reality of all this responsibility settles in and I worry. Worry that I know what is going on and can do the job. More importatnly is that I will do the right thing. Trusting instincts are good, but what if your instinct is wrong. That is bad! That being said, I have to do more independently. I like it, because it tells me people trust me to do the right thing on my own. I also like having that extra advice and help from people. I guess that is me not ever having to be in this situation before. I am taking the good with the bad. It is overwhelming sometimes, and fun other times. Today for example was super stressful, but actually fun. I spent time with Keith just troubleshooting multiple problems at once.

I just hope that when push comes to shove I get the job done. It is weird. I wanted to write about this (this blog is after all for me to speak my mind), but I know their is a 50/50 chance that Gus will read this. I don’t think I mind, but it is weird knowing he could have have. So, oh great and powerful boss of mine, if you do read this just don’t ever bring it up that you did. That way ignorance is bliss for me:)

Work is busy, I wouldn’t have it any other way!

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I have so much to do I don’t know where to begin sometimes. Then I get side tracked with people making requests. I feel bad because I am telling them I need requests for most non-system down problems. Just because I won’t get anything done otherwise. I like that people still feel they can ask me to do stuff, but most user requests are completed by Keith and justin now. I am spending my time trying to figure out how to do a highly available FTP system for a new client of ours. I am also looking into getting MRTG working on a red hat box. I have the windows version downloaded, but I am trying linux first. Going to windows will be admitting defeat for me. I came to the conclusion today that I need more ready to go testing machines. I currently need 2-3 linux machines to test stuff on. MRTG, FTP, & DHCP/DNS. I also need to setup a windows domain on another machine. Proxy server on yet another box. I have no room at my desk and my server room is getting cramped. Not full yet, but it is getting interesting.

On top of priority issues I have to do a scripted IIS web server install with one of the developers. We need this for a system refresh we are planning. I don’t know when it will happen, but it needs to be soon.

On a good note, I bought a NAS (network attached storage) device a few weeks ago. We wanted it to move files between offices. It is 4x faster or so than our USB hard drive solution we had. The NAS is only 4lbs so we just bring it to the colo or our office and just plug it in. It is awesome. Our hard to please DBA’s were very happy about it.

I got a ton of hardware approvals today. Lots of misc gear to keep things running in top shape. Gus grumbled about it, but signed off. I think he likes doing that. I still need to ask for some more hard drives for our dev and qa servers. our databases are growing so much we keep running out of space

More Stuff & Stress

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So I find out late Monday afternoon where all my stress and anguish originated from. Turns out Gus did something that inadvertintly caused our problems. Keith and I busted on him for a while (Keith more than me since I was out of the office by then) but I am going to cut him a break. He ussually is correct about alot of things. That is of course why we bust on him when he IS wrong. More details to this story, but I cant go into it. Needless to say my being vauge is nessisary, and the story quite funny in the end. If you want sick humor.

Things going on

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So I tried sleeping a different way last night. I think the way I lay my arms is causing them to hurt the next day. I think that may be causing my pain when typing and mouse clicking. Not sure. My hands hurt still, but I need to give it a few days and see.

Still have no idea what my plans are for the holiday weekend. Until yesterday I forgot that next monday was a holiday. John and I try again for poker this Saturday.

Our next softball game is tomorrow. It is supposed to rain, so I don’t know what is going to happen. We play my sisters company Standard & Poors. She wasn’t sure if she knew people on the softball team. I assume that they may have more then one since they have like 2000 people working for them.

Dam wireless

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I am having some issues with my Thinkpad. It is not doing wireless very well. I had issues yesterday in a meeting. I had no signal where I normally get good signal. Then last night the dam thing got low signal while I sat at my desk at home. I sit right over the dam wireless point so why did it have bad signal while my mac got great signall? Well, I have no idea. My netstumbler (a wireless signal and network meeter software program) also showed poor signal quaility. I need to check signal streangth with another laptop with netstumbler. if it is fine I have a bad wireless card. If it is bad, then something is wrong with both networks at work and home. That is unlikely.

3ware vs Promise

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Ok if you are not a tech person you will have no idea what I am talking about, but today I give a new type of IDE RAID card a try. We currently use Promise IDE RAID cards and enclosures for some lower end data storage needs. We don’t run database servers on them, but we do store huge amounts of images and static web pages on them. They perform well so far. We really have not given them a head to head speed test Vs SCSCI RAID. The reviews I read say they are slower but not by that much. My big concern has been swapping drives out if/when they go bad. If that is simple and they are close to the speed of SCSI, I am sold. Why? They are like half the price of SCSI.

We are primarly a windows company but recently we have been doing more and more linux. the servers we are getting that use the promise IDE RAID are having issues with the newer versions of Red Hat. That is a problem with linux. the really new hardware does not work with the really new versions of the OS. Dam read hat is coming out with a new version every 6 months or less.

To solve our problem we are looking at a company called 3ware. They also make IDE RAID cards. Gus said he knows people who like them and run Linux. Since if I don’t listen to him, I get hit I decided to try one out. Well he doesn’t hit me, but he does get my blood pressure up 20 extra points by pulling some sort of prank!

I will have reviews hopefully by tomorrow.

Got a new place

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So I signed the papers today for my new apartment. As much as I wanted to buy something I think in this economy I wanted to keep “liquid”. I am moving into the first apartment I spoke about last week. It is a 1 bedroom in the building complex I currently live in. I am in the other building, on the 19th floor. I have a fantastic view of the manhattan skyline, and a patio.

I get to move in July 1, 2003. Now I have to find a way out of my current lease or else I am paying double rent for 2 months.

The bad news is the furniture I am going to get is not arriving till September or so. My parents are giving me their mint condition living room set, since my mom wants something new. Granted this set is like 15 years old, but she has not let anyone sit on the couch except for company in like 10 years. It is in fantastic shape. The wall unit is huge. They want me to take the dining room set also. That did not wear as well, and I don’t know if I have room for it. I was told I get it after the jewish holiday’s in september, or whenever they fall out this year. I really don’t know. I am that religious.

I am going to wait until after I get back from vacation to take care of all the address changing things. the major deal is changing the cable to the new apartment. I will have pictures before I move in. I have some but they are not very good. I will take a bunch in June after they paint and do the bedroom carpeting.

Now all I need is a girlfriend to hang out at my new place, but that is a different story!!!

Stuff & Stress

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Have you ever had a bad day? Of course you have. Have you ever had a bad day, but were unable to talk to most people about it? That is today for me. Hectic things going on that I cannot go into. I am bursting at the seams to, but I can’t. It has been a day where I should have been able to give good answers to problems, and was unable to. It was a day where you think you setup something to work well, and then under pressure you find minor errors totally screw up the results you were looking for. Enough self pitty. I am in a highly stressful job. I am dealing. Just some days nothing goes right, and other days things hum perfectly. Today was the former type of day. One thing I keep thinking about is the saying that whatever does not kill you makes you stronger. That may be true, but it is not a consolation prize.

One thing I am realizing is that I keep adding to my list of to do’s and I am not taking things off that list in the same fast pace. Not a good trend. I did get some stuff off my task list before hell broke loose today. I sent out our proposed network diagram to our telecom integrator. They will build our system off that basic model.

I have my Database staff asking for more hard drive space on their development and QA machines. Even though last week they said they probibly didn’t need this space. I need to get money approved for that, and then juggle the new deployment of that hardware. Getting money approved is a chore, but I am beginning to get used to it. Almost lke it. Why you may ask. It sharpens my debate and reasoning skills. If I can explain to my management why we need something, and get them to agree I probibly can sell anything:) Well maybe not, but it is a feat to get the OK to buy stuff at my company. I keeps me honest, and proves the need for anything we do actually purchase.

I showed our CEO the new Thinkpad T40 laptop today. He liked it but had some issues with it. I am going to give it to him for a few days to see if it grows on him. We don’t want to stay with dell.

How lazy can we get?

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Ok so I tried out this fresh direct. It actually was really good. They came within a half an hour of when they said they would. And they apologized for being late! I even cooked up a steak I ordered from them. it was good. This begs to question how lazy can we (i) get? I don’t even have to goto the grocery store if I don’t want to. Is that a good or bad thing? Food shopping is ok to miss out on. But what about regular shopping? I spent about 2 hours with my dad today shopping at best buy. he wanted to look for DVD’s. Waiting on line all I could think about was how we could have just gotten DVD’s off amazon. The scary thing is that he would have probably gotten 50 times the selection off amazon also. So do we shop because we need stuff, or do we shop because it is a social thing and we need stuff? I am getting philosophical, but I took a class in college that focused on post WWII American culture. One aspect we covered was the mall culture. People actually spend the day at the mall, buying things is optional. Is the mall culture dead? Is the online buying culture alive and well? Probably not yet, but I have narrowed down the number of things I need to goto a physical store for by allot. I think there are less things I need to go out to a store for than there are that I can order and have shipped to me. Don’t get me wrong. I like to shop if it is for the write stuff. I actually liked spending time with my dad shopping. I don’t get to spend that much time with him so it was cool, but I avoid the mall now a days. I used to go just to go. Weird world we live in where I changed my entire perspective on something in less than 3 years.

I think I decided on what apartment to get. I will probably pick the first one I saw. The second one looked nicer, but I just had a not so good feeling about it. Even though the real-estate agent is expensive, it is not much more than doing it myself. The guy I would deal directly with wanted me to kick back his friend. The amount he wanted didn’t save me anything, since his rent would be higher than the other apartment.

Softball hurts

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I ended up playing softball friday. It was very cold and slightly rainy. I only hit, I didn’t feel up to fielding. I am way out of shape after all. Turns out I did ok. I had 2 hits, and got out on a pop fly. I had one run. As Gus pointed out I did better than Keith who is athletic allot more than I am!

We went to some japanese bar after the game. It was nice. I hurt really bad this morning. Not used to any sport recently. Running in doc martin shoes is not a good idea either.

Some people were going to a karaoke bar after the first bar. I ended up taking off then. I don’t need to pay a cover to hear bad singers sing to me.

Poker plans for today were canceled. Not sure why, but John said he is trying to get a game with his brother and some guys next weekend. I told him I was in if he could get a game going.

I ended up working a bit today. I also slept late. that is always nice on a weekend. I went over to my parents for dinner. My aunt gale was over. I haven’t seen her in ages, probably since my sister’s wedding. Also my sister and morgan were over. Morgan is a cranky baby. I think she is just gassy. I got to feed her. it went well. I rate not getting puked on as a passing grade. She makes the funniest faces when she is sleeping. Every time I see her napping I think of the Barenaked ladies song “when you dream”. it is about what does a baby actually think about when they sleep. It is so funny, but true. You should give it a listen.

My dad wants to goto bestbuy tomorrow. That will be a loss of money for me. I always buy something when I go to that place. he needs to return a DVD or something.

I ordered from an online food delivery service called Freshdirect. A few people told me about it. Dan at work used it and thinks it is great. I got $50 in free steaks and they will deliver on sunday night. I will let you know how it goes. Still a few things I need to get at the regular grocery store that I couldn’t get online. But this seems like a great first step to no more food shopping.